Dating Tips For Men: Learning The Art of Pickup

 

If you have seen the vh1 show, The Pickup Artist, you will have an idea about what pickup is all about. The reality show is composed of male contestants who have been unsuccessful when it comes to dating with women. On the show, they were taught by Mystery and his guys about the art of pickup.

Off-screen, pickup is a bit different. There may be competition among men, but they are not on a contest. Men who are involved in pickup are mostly pickup artists. They are already skilled in dating with women. Some of them were also unsuccessful with girls but managed to learn how to pickup women and became an expert on it.

The pickup artist community is not only for skilled men. Those who were unsuccessful with girls are already joining the community by trying to improve themselves. Pickup is not just about using the cocky and funny technique by David DeAngelo, the mystery method, or any techniques thereof. Sure you can use them but there are a lot of things that you should know and master before you can pickup girls easily. You don't have to join the reality tv show, The Pickup Artist, just to learn the art of pickup. Today, there are a lot of ways on how to do it:

1. Seminars. By attending seminars and conventions, you will gain more knowledge about pickup. The more ideas you have about the pickup community subculture, the more you will be prepared. I would suggest going to conventions or seminars attended by pickup artists themselves and not just gurus or teachers. Pickup artists usually share infield footage, experience, and their own techniques in dating women.

2. Bootcamps. A lot of pickup artists organize a bootcamp. Here, you will get proper training in pickup. You will also get a chance to see them pickup random women in any location. This is a good opportunity to see how they do the pickup and learn from it. Plus, you also get to do it yourself - practice what you have learned.

3. Workshops. Pickup artists offers workshops or trainings. There is nothing more advantageous than being trained by a pickup artist. These workshops are not only about how to's with women but also improving yourself.

4. Online. The internet is where you can get a lot of ideas, articles, opinions, facts, live footages, and just about everything about the art of pickup. There are e-books available from gurus like David DeAngelo. You may also subscribe to pickup artists' newsletter to get updated by them. These newsletters are full of tips from pickup artists so they're quite helpful.

You may have heard a lot of things about the art of pickup. Often, pickup artists talk about how they could easily approach a woman and end up going to bed with them. Perhaps that is what attracts most men in the art of pickup.

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How Pickup Artists Became Experts in Dating

With the advent of technology, many have become a couch potato at an early age which is one of the reasons why they become shy and are not active with their social life. There are a lot of men who are lousy with girls especially those who we call, nerds. Women don't even notice them around because they seem to have their own world.

When the pickup artist or the seduction community was born in the early nineties, these "nerds" or just the shy ones have been given the chance to be an expert when it comes to girls. A lot of these men has been unbelievably transformed into a chic magnet. David DeAngelo himself claims that he failed on girls as well before he learned about the art of pickup.

When Vh1 launched The Pickup Artist show with Mystery, the community has been more popularized and more men became involved. Today, men whom girls thought were lousy, nerd, weird, and some they haven't even recognized, have now evolved into some girls' magnet. At first, I thought it was exaggerated. I know that people can develop their confidence, but to turn some nerd or weirdo into a chic magnet is another story. But when I started to search for more information about it, I have seen how it could all be possible. I have also read some reviews about the Double Your Dating ebook by David DeAngelo and I guess that must really be a good read. Though I'd prefer attending bootcamps or seminars rather than reading an e-book.

With the help of master pickup artists, men can really develop their dating skills. I have watched a convention attended by Julian Foxx and other PUAs. I admit I was impressed with their crafts. There are a lot of things that we have taken for granted and never took notice of it. Men need to understand a lot of things to know how to get a girl for a date. If you do not know how menstruation affects the girls' preference for men, then you gotta ask Julian Foxx about it.

I guess these things that PUAs teach are not only for men who wants to be like them. These are also for men who are looking for a long-term relationship and wants to improve themselves. By gaining more trust and self-confidence, they can have the courage to approach girls and the skills to attract them.

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The Pickup Artist Scenarios in a Nightclub

With the popularity of the pickup artist community today, picking up girls has been very apparent. Nightclubs and bars are the very common places where men think they can find women to date and eventually sleep with.

When you say pickup, most men expect or at least hope to end up "sleeping" with their dates. That could also be the reason why some men got interested into pickup. Looking at the pickup artists who pickup hot women anytime and anywhere are really envious especially if they brag about getting in bed with them.

The problem with this approach is that women are being suspicious with your intentions. Worse, they already know some approaches like the Cocky & Funny from David DeAngelo. So obviously, it won't work anymore unless you're good enough to keep her suspicions away.

Here are the six simple approaches on how to pickup girls at the nightclub:

1. Do not think about pickup. Do not think that your goal is to pickup women. It will only give you more pressure. Real pickup artists are skilled enough to do the pickup strategies. Just stay cool and think of enjoying the night with friends and "new friends."

2. Mingle with others. Going to nightclubs and bars is part of your social life so socialize with others. The best approach to pickup a woman is not to think about picking her up at all. Approach her normally, and start a little chit chat.

3. Avoid using pickup lines. Most dating techniques are too public nowadays that women are already familiar with the usual pickup lines. IF you have memorized some "openers" from Mystery, forget about them. Some may work but its better not to risk and lose your opportunity with a woman.

4. Eye contact. It is one of the most effective way to flirt. Maintain eye contact to let her know that its her you're looking at. But you should be very careful in communicating with her through eye contact. Do not stare as if you're checking her from head to toe. Just flirt a little and see if she responds positively.

5. Approach her in your most natural way. Not because its the most effective but because its what you're comfortable at. If you use some techniques you just heard from someone, chance is you'll get nervous, get blank, or simply flop.

6. Do not be afraid of rejection. Even the famous David DeAngelo gets rejected, too.

Don't be too overwhelmed with pickup. The pickup artist community may have introduced a lot of dating techniques but not all will work for you. Its all about improving yourself, understanding women, and developing your skills. The most important thing in pickup is to be natural.

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How To Pickup Women on Valentine's Day

Its February, the love month, as people call it. Few days from now, it will be Valentine's Day. It would be such a shame (at least for some) if you don't have a date. Almost everyone is excited for the that day to come. So it got me thinking... How does someone like Mystery celeberate Valentine's Day? Or do they even celebrate it? It seems like they can have a valentine's day anytime they want to. They'd just throw in some pickup lines then instantly date some hot chick and go to bed with them if they get too lucky.

Since the Valentine fever is hot right now, I thought I'd do some research on how to pickup a woman for valentine's day. I found nothing fresh from David DeAngelo, still the same old cocky and funny thing. So, I just went on reading some usual tips which were just stated in different ways. Here are different ways on how to get a date on Valentine's Day:

1. If you have some prospects of whom to date on the 14th, start contacting her now. Since we're talking about the pickup artist way of celebrating Valentine's Day, don't ASK her to be your date on that day. If its both your first time together, you can invite her out for tonight but not to date.

2. Let's say you don't have someone in mind to date on the big day. Get your phone and look for some numbers of hot women (I assume you have at least 10 of them stored on your phone) you've met before. Start texting them but don't get obvious with your plans. Just a casual text will do.

3. If you don't have a particular date on the 14th, go to a party. This sounds more fun! Surely there will be a lot of Valentine's Day events and it means there'll be lots of parties around full of hot single ladies.

Those ideas will be most effective if you know how to socialize with women and converse with them in the right way. Don't try to be some romantic guy and never let her feel that you are dying to date her. The cocky and funny technique by David DeAngelo might work. Its year 2010 already and gone were the days when guys have to feed women with gifts.

If you don't know what I'm talking about, then its time you get to learn some skills. There are pickup artists who would be willing to help you. You can attend seminars, trainings, or bootcamps. For starters, you may subscribe to their newsletter for free.

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A Peek Into the Pickup Artist Community

With the growing popularity of the seduction community or what most people call, the pickup artist community, more men are eager to improve themselves and learn the techniques of the pickup artist. Today, there are a lot of dating experts and PUAs who help other men in dating and pickup. But it was not Mystery nor David DeAngelo who pioneered in the seduction community. It actually originated from Ross Jeffries.

Jeffries is a former comedy writer. He created the "Speed Seduction," a Neuro-linguistic Programming (NLP) technique. David DeAngelo, the famous PUA and guru, was actually a student of Ross Jeffries, who was also the pickup mentor of Neil Strauss in his bestselling book, "The Game: Penetrating the Secret Society of Pickup Artists".

As the seduction community was growing, each pickup artist or guru developed their own techniques. There's the "Mystery Method" by Mystery and "Cocky & Funny" by David DeAngelo. Accronyms, terminologies and jargons in the community has also been created. For example, AFC (Average Frustrated Chump) is what they call to males who are incompetent with women.

With its rapid growth, the seduction community has also received negative feedback and comments. It has been characterized in the San Francisco Chronicle to be "a puerile cult of sexual conquest." Feminists also reacted negatively to the whole pickup thing and think that it is offensive.

Despite the criticisms, the seduction community is still growing and becoming popular. In 2007, VH1 started the reality show, "The Pickup Artist," with Mystery and other PUAs on it. It has even raised more awareness about the community and attracted more men to join in.

Pickup materials have also spread most especially in the internet. E-books, DVDs, CDs, trainings, seminars, bootcamps, and workshops. Online communities were formed where men share their experiences, learn from others, discuss about pickup and seduction, or sometimes boast around.

Although there can be a lot of things to be criticized in the seduction community, fact still remains that it has helped a lot of men especially the "AFCs". It has helped them develop social skills and gain self-confidence.

The things that the pickup artists and gurus teach to men may be too advanced and can be seen as offensive for women. But it all depends on how men use it. Some men's goal is just to gain confidence and how to deal with women in dating. Pickup is not just for playing around, it can also be for men who seek a serious relationship.

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